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You Might Be an Internet Marketer IF….

This is borrowed from Ray’s Blog at imadspace.com … Thank you Ray!

From time to time, it’s healthy to poke a little fun at ourselves. In that spirit, I offer the following:

You MIGHT be an Internet Marketer IF…….

1) You are familiar with names such as Mike Filsane, Gary Ambrose, Joe Vitale and Mark Widawer, but you think Barack Obama is a type of sushi

2) You have more email addresses than silverware

3) You are considering replacing your office chair with a port-a-johnny because going to the bathroom takes away too much valuable computer time

4) You are actually able to convince people that they will make more money by reading emails at 3-cents a pop than getting a part-time job at 7-11

5) You manage to get visitors to your splash page to believe that the mansion, sports car, swimming pool and yatch displayed on your page actually belong to you

6) Words such as niche, matrix, and AdSense roll off your tongue effortlessly, but you occasionally struggle to remember the names of your kids

7) You consider 1:00am a reasonable time for lunch

8) You believe spending $5000-$10000 on a particular “gurus” mentoring program is a better use of funds than spending it on a college education, or food

9) You use the term “guru” regularily

10) You spend more time in Internet Marketing discussion forums than you do in your own living room

11) You believe there are ebooks available that are actually worth $97

12) All of your products are priced ending in 7 rather than 9

13) You have a spiral-bound notebook to keep track of all your UserIDs and passwords

14) You think “Winepress” is a new type of blogging software

15) Your spouse tells you in the morning that you kept uttering the word “downline” in your sleep

16) All your “friends” on MySpace are Internet Marketers

17) You don’t see the irony of the words “bum” and “marketing” appearing in the same sentence

18) You have the Paypal support number assigned to the “1″ button on your speed dial

19) You believe people actually read every word of those mile-long columnar sales pages

20) Your family and friends suggest that you are becoming obsessive/compulsive with this Internet Marketing “thing”. You spend the next 3 days developing an “Obsessive/Compulsive Internet Marketer’s” niche site with AdSense.

21) Unlike the general population, you use the word “viral” in a positive context

22) When your teenager comes home from school, he tells you he made the JV team. You ask him what his product is.

23) You believe firmly that your products are worth $97, $197, $297, or more, but you constantly ask others where you can buy a domain name for $1

24) You think “I want to make money” represents a valid business plan

25) When you woke up, your spouse reminded you that today is your 8-year old’s 10th birthday

26) You think a Pop Tart is a new kind of floating ad

27) You celebrate the freedom that running your own IM business from your home gives you, while you sit at your computer for 80+ hours a week

28) And finally, you understood more the 90% of the above

Your are welcome to add your own little ditties to this list in the comments.

-Ray

http://www.imadspace.com

5 Responses to “You Might Be an Internet Marketer IF….”


  1. 1 Scott Clark Oct 8th, 2007 at 12:06 pm

    Ok, spooked. Lots of these are reasonable sounding to me.

    PS: My 4th grader can explain precisely what a niche is any day of the week.

    #20 is the best - I can’t walk around the real world without identifying unexploited verticals subconsciously. Trouble is, I have no time to actually execute on them. Perhaps the port-a-johny idea would help.

    Sc

  2. 2 Chocolate Chip Cookie May 25th, 2008 at 11:20 am

    A few of these had me laughing as how closely it resembled me, what a great list :)

  3. 3 Genesis Bible Jun 16th, 2008 at 7:13 pm

    haha … i knew a few of these characters

  4. 4 gas rebate cards Jun 26th, 2009 at 1:49 am

    Well now that he is president I hope people wouldn’t think that Barrack is a type of sushi ..lol. lol eew at #3… haha #5 is certainly correct, you just never know what to believe these days… and it’s a shame to have to be reminded that your 8 year old is actually turning 10.. lol

    -Randy

  5. 5 used tires Sep 26th, 2009 at 9:49 pm

    I can definitely relate to this list! LOL, is that good or bad? =D

    Till then,

    Jean

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